Call Me....Maybe

OK, so this song has been parodied and remade a gazillion times already.  But, here are my favorites.  So silly.  Have a laugh.  Then call me, maybe if you want to.

One for all my baby-wearing friends:

One that the kids love, and I confess, I think is brilliant (way better than the original, in fact):



For political junkies.  (This has more substance than most of Obama's speeches. *snark*)

Saraa sings the classics

Hospitality

Last week I did a few interviews for EightM.  One of them was on the meaning and practice of hospitality.  Please ignore the completely crazy face in this still shot.  *ahem*

It's FRIDAY, but SUNDAY'S comin'!

Blessed Good Friday to you!  Hang on until Sunday!

Beautiful Things

This song is like a balm to the soul.

My Lenten Song

I have been rockin' this song for three days.  It instantly puts me in an amazing mood!

Sing it Vestal!

(I gotta get me one of those hankies.)  I am one of the few of my generation who has a true appreciation for this old-time Gospel music.



The kids like this song as well, but wondered at some of what it meant.  Explaining it to them, I realized that this is sort of my Lent song.  Laying aside some lesser things, making my journey a little lighter, pressing on, gotta make it heaven somehow.

If I could still I wouldn't take nothing for my journey now.

How To Be Obnoxious

Thought this was pretty close to reality, despite the robot voices.  I think I will try to respond as the woman in this clip does.  Have a laugh and enjoy!

River of Blessings

 We dedicated River surrounded by our faith community--treasured friends and family.

On the day of their dedication we have given each of our children
a prophetic declaration of their identity
and affirming their worth and value to the Lord and to our family.

They shall be abundantly satisfied with the fullness of your house, and you shall make them drink of the river of your pleasures.  Psalm 36:8

Who loves baby?

Grandma and River

Godmother and River
(would you look at this handsome kid in this adorable outfit, a gift from his Godparents!)

See my sister there in the background?
She came down especially for the dedication, but her husband couldn't make it.
So, he Skyped in for the whole thing!  How special is that?!

God-sister and River

Nana and River

Papa and River



One of River's intercessors, Aaron, gave him a very special gift: The Book of Revelation.  He quoted the first two chapters from memory.  "Blessed is the one who reads the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it..." Revelation 1:3  

River's Godparents, Jordan and Kristina imparted to River wisdom and knowledge, worship and joy.  And read Psalm 98 over him.

Papa and Nana praying for him and dedicating him to the Lord.

Papa, aka Bishop Gabe, charging us and all the witnesses to live faithfully before River and to lead him in the ways of Christ.

Presenting River with his first Bible.

Speaking to his spirit:

Gana and I read the prophetic declaration to him.

Our dear friend Jeff and Micha gave him the gift of actual water from the River Jordan.  We anointed him with it and prayed.

We are so blessed by all these children who know how to pray and bless!

Signing the declaration, which now hangs in our living room along with our other children's declarations:

Time to party!

It has been my mother's tradition when each of her grandchildren are dedicated to prepare a celebration and reception afterwards.  Each time it is so unique.  This one was a cupcake fondue!  Mini-cupcakes, frosting in the fondue pots and tons of little goodies to dip it in (sprinkles, chocolate chips, coconut, chopped nuts, etc.).  How cute is that?!  Along with it, milk in glass milk bottles with blue and white paper straws or a delicious coffee punch!

The adults' table:

The kids' table:

This is what River was doing by the end of the night:

Whoever brings blessing will be enriched,

and one who waters will himself be watered. 

Proverbs 11:25

Velociraptor vs. Human

Belgee said to me, "Mom!  I can be a velociraptor!"  And after the demonstration he said, "Now watch!  I can be a human."

Shadow Feet

Two mornings in a row I've awakened singing this song.  I don't even remember the last time I heard it, so I don't know why it would be in my head, my spirit, and on my lips.  One of those times I think the Holy Spirit is singing through me.


"He," the Spirit in you, "maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God," and God searches your heart not to know what your conscious prayers are, but to find out what is the prayer of the Holy Spirit.  The Spirit of God needs the nature of the believer as a shrine in which to offer his intercession.  --Oswald Chambers in My Utmost For His Highest, November 8

Bad Parenting = Good Marketing

During my Lying-In I have spent more time than usual watching television.  I have noticed a disturbing trend (well, there are plenty of disturbing things on television, but this post is about just one).  There are an inordinate number of commercials right now that use terrible parenting as a means of marketing product and services.

I'm thinking back to the old days when a commercial would feature a mother saying, "I buy brand X because it's the very best thing for my family."  Those days are gone my friend, right along with rotary phone.  These days to sell a product the parent is shown to be either completely clueless or a downright jerk.

It's sad really.  And yet we laugh.

Don't believe me?  Here are four samples:



This one has the same dude playing the dad as the Geico ad above.  He's really good at playing the bad dad.







How I long for the good ol' days with commercials like this:




Indeed.  A very clever Mommy.

Totally like whatever, you know?

This video is the perfect sequel to THIS POST.



It's OK to have an opinion and to own it.  It's OK for other people to have opinions and to own them.  And it's OK to believe that your opinion is the right one.

I wish I had written the above monologue.

I almost blogged today about how much I love toast.

John and Joe

The Machine That Goes PING!

My last post for Empowered Birth Week: The Machine That Goes PING!

My two favorite lines:

1. When the mother asks, "What do I do?"  The doctor replies, "Nothing.  You're not qual-i-fied!"

2. When the father walks in and the doctor asks who is he and then says, "I'm sorry.  Only people involved are allowed in here."

Makes me laugh out loud every time!



Hope you had a wonderfully empowered week, complete with trippy dreams.  You have until midnight tonight to link up with any birth stories or photos and enter to win something cool.

Natural Childbirth According to Bill Cosby

So grateful that it's not really like this.  But, there's just enough of the hint of something familiar in it to make us laugh 'til the tears run down our legs.




Happy Empowered Birth Week!  You still have time to link up with your pictures or birth stories here.

Empowered Birth Week, Day 2: Failure To Progress

It's a wonder to me that every woman doesn't fail to progress when you consider how many people are monitoring her!  It makes me twitchy just thinking about strangers standing around staring at me trying to birth a baby.  I mean, I've had close friends and family at births, but that's a far cry from orderlies, nurses, interns, and doctors whom I've never met.

Here's a brilliant short to inspire you banish "failure to progress" from your vocabulary!  I dare you to not laugh!



And now click over to Mama Birth for "Obstetric Lie #100--Failure to Progress."

And don't forget to link up on yesterday's post with your birth story and/or birth pictures!  Regardless of how your baby made his or her entrance, it's a powerful thing to grow a baby and to become a mother!  Celebrate Empowered Birth Week with me!

Say Something Nice

Is it the pregnancy hormones?  I just watched this and wept and laughed.  At the same time.



My goal today is to be kind--to myself.  And to my kids.  And to my husband.  And to people at the grocery store.  And even these people in Los Angeles who don't know how to drive.  There is so much negativity already.  I'm going to SAY SOMETHING NICE.

Feeling warm and fuzzy already.  (And believe it or not, I'm saying that without any sarcasm.)

By pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned....2 Corinthians 6:6

(Leave me a comment and say something nice.  No, it does not have to be about me or this blog post.  Just something nice in general.  I'll post all your nice comments in a separate blog post and we'll send love and kindness into the world!)

It's World Breastfeeding Week!

Hurray for  Boobs!!!!

Deep Philosophical Differences--UPDATED

Today I read in a Baby Center newsletter, supposedly tailored to my 28th week of pregnancy, "expert opinions" in response to this question:

How Do You Feel About Birth Plans?

Erica Breneman
Obstetrician in Oakland, California, and mother of one

I'm not a big fan of birth plans because I think they're often too detailed and specific about things that are unpredictable. However, I do think it's a good idea for women to discuss their wishes with their providers before delivery. A birth plan might facilitate this discussion. It's certainly reasonable to bring a brief written description of your general birth philosophy and wishes to the hospital so that on-call doctors and nurses who haven't met you get a sense of your desires.

MaryJane Lewitt
Certified Nurse-Midwife in Atlanta, Georgia, and mother of two

I love birth plans. They help me understand what you want from your birth and what your perfect delivery would be like. Every person is different and has different needs, wants, and expectations for their birth experience. A birth plan allows me to start assisting you with your birth without having to quiz you about your desires while you're in pain. Also, if things happen during labor that result in changes from your plan, I can provide options that keep us as close to your ideal birth as possible.

Samantha Maplethorpe
Family Physician in Issaquah, Washington, and mother of three

I like birth plans very much. They're wonderful communication tools. I usually suggest that my patients attend a labor education and support class for first-time parents and develop a birth plan around the beginning of the third trimester. This gives us enough time to discuss the plan and for patients to modify their expectations if need be. I try to tailor my supervision of pregnancy and labor and delivery to the style of the new parents. I usually send a copy of the birth plan to the hospital for inclusion in a patient's chart so the nurses can read it, but patients shouldn't assume it has been read. My only tip is to prepare for the unexpected and be flexible to any necessary change at delivery.

Notice that the family practitioner and the midwife like birth plans because birth plans help them better serve their clients.  Notice that the obstetrician doesn't like birth plans because they are too specific about what the client wants. 
 
Ummmmmm..........
 
Who here still thinks a surgeon is the best person to help you achieve the kind of natural and empowering birth experience you want?  Anyone???? 

They just don't make 'em like they used to.

(This is by no means a judgment on today's homemakers, merely a cultural commentary on the changing times.  Don't take it personally.  Let's laugh at ourselves.)

In the last year or so my sister and I taken to emailing one another links to blogs with "recipes".  I use that word very lightly, because I'm not exactly sure you'd call some of them recipes.  I mean, if I make a bowl of popcorn tonight and I put some butter and salt on it, would you call that a recipe?  Or if tomorrow at breakfast I toast a bagel and schmear it with cream cheese would you need a step-by-step instructions?  I certainly hope not.  But some of the recipes have been that bad  good.

For example:

Grilled Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich from The Hidden List.  There are a list of ingredients and directions.  Really?  You couldn't probably come up with the ingredient list on your own?  Or how about this gem: specific instructions on spreading marshmallow cream and peanut butter on bread.  Silly me, I thought that was something we didn't admit to eating, not something we outlined in great detail.

Or how about this: "I knew that taco seasoning had to be something we could make at home.  I have grown tired of looking for Taco Seasoning at the supermarket that doesn’t contain MSG.  It couldn’t be that tricky to mix up, right?"  What?  You mean Mexican women don't use El Paso Taco Seasoning packets in their taco meat?  Taco seasoning always seemed fairly self-explanatory.  In fact, I cannot remember when/if I ever bought any pre-prepared mix.  But in case you get lost somewhere between the onion and the cumin, thankfully, there are detailed instructions here for mixing your own taco seasoning. 

The internet is just full of useful tidbits like this.  Such as step-by-step instructions for tossing cooked boxed spaghetti with butter.  It gets worse, much worse, folks.  For the aspiring cook who doesn't know how to boil water, I present Iced Tea via Allrecipes.com.  It says (I kid you not), "Like real iced tea, but do you hate boiling the water..."  And goes on to describe running hot water from your tap over tea bags.  Yep. 

Yesterday I might have found one to top them all, and of course I email it to my sister: Roast Chicken.  This "recipe" (and I know playing fast and loose with the word "recipe") is to salt and pepper a whole chicken and bake it until juices run clear.  It's explained in not one, not two, but five (that's 5!!!) whole steps!  She doesn't even truss it.  And it still takes 5 steps to explain how to roast a chicken.  No offense, but some food bloggers would be better suited to writing satire.

In extreme contrast, remember this antique book I picked up?  I decided to find something to make from it the other day.  And I found recipes such as this:

Cream Pie
A scant cup of sugar, yolks of two eggs, three tablespoons flour, three cups milk for two pies, teaspoonful butter.  Bake crust first.--Mrs. C.H. Wright.

And this:

Pumpkin Pie
Two eggs, one cup milk, pumpkin enough to thicken, sweeten to taste and flavor with mixed spices.--Mrs. Evert Adams.

Better yet:

Six Minute Cake
Break the whites of two eggs in a cup, fill to one-half with soft butter, fill to top with sweet milk.  Sift together three times one cup sugar, one and on-half cups flour, one and one-half teaspoons of baking powder.  Put all together and stir six minutes.  Bake carefully.--Mrs. W.H. Robinson

I'm not completely sure what it means to "bake carefully."

One more:

Snow Cake
One-half teacup butter, one cup sugar, one and one-half cup of flour, one-half cup of sweet milk, whites of four eggs, one teaspoon Royal Baking Powder.  Delicious

Did you notice there are no instructions for the preparing the pans, preparing the crusts, temperature or length of time to bake, how to check for doneness or how to serve?  I suppose it was just assumed that there were some things that everyone knew how to do.  Any homemaker worth her salt wouldn't need to be patronized with how all the ingredients went together.  They knew how to do that already.

In the antique Home Ec. book it states: "...it is important for a pupil to realize that the thousand and one recipes found in a single cookbook consists of about fifteen basic recipes, each having many variations."  So, it would seem if we knew the basic fifteen or so, we could forgo the annoying instructions about how to boil boxed pasta or make a peanut butter sandwich or stick a whole untrussed chicken in the oven with salt on it.  But then, makers of convenience foods would be out of a job and writers of cookbooks and food bloggers would actually have to learn to cook.

Of course, our other alternative is to zap some PopTarts: